A Slight Miscalculation
by SingingCheese
Summary: On an otherwise uneventful Halloween night, Hermione, graduated and the new Hogwarts healer, is faced with an unusual problem... a little tiny bit of SSHG


**A/N: Sleep deprivation and my playlist; they make a dangerous pair. This is something from the AU of my brain, and it's not really compatible with anything so don't try to make it work. It doesn't. Also- I understand this is highly improbable...but I couldn't help it. I only do what the voices tell me to. : )**

**Disclaimer: (sob) Not mine; I make no $$$ off of this story. I only own the plot, which I am responsible for.**

**Typed to: Soundtracks of "Rent" and "Rocky Horror Picture Show"**

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Hermione Granger, newly instated school healer, surveyed the empty hospital wing with growing apprehension. Halloween at Hogwarts was almost over, and nothing out of the ordinary had occured- not even a second year managing to set his robes on fire trying to light candles in a few pumpkins. Of course, since her years at Hogwarts, the Halloween mishaps had decreased dramatically on the disaster scale. But with so many students shut up in one place and in a giddy mood, it seemed almost given that accidents would happen. 

With a sigh, she slowly retrieved a copy of the _Evening Prophet _from the desk in her office, and settled onto the edge of one of the meticulously made beds. Soon she was so engrossed in her reading that she didn't hear the quiet knock at the hospital wing door.

A great black shape glided into the room, out of place against the otherwise light interior. It spoke in a deep, silky baritone.

"Miss Granger." Hermione jumped, startled by the sound of the voice.

"Professor Snape? Shouldn't you be downstairs at the Halloween feast?" she asked, caught off guard by the strange appearance, both of the Potions Master in the hospital wing and of the Potions Master himself.

Snape wore his black, buttoned coat, but instead of the billowing black teaching robes, he had covered it with a hooded cloak, pulling the hood up to conceal almost his entire head, leaving only his face exposed.

"Yes, normally I would have been compelled by the Headmaster to join the..._festivities_," he intoned, laying a delicate, distasteful stress on the word, "But there was some research I wished to complete in my laboratory, and so remained in the dungeons."

Hermione frowned. "Then- and I'm assuming you weren't seeking the joys of my company- why are you here?"

Snape sighed. "I made a...slight miscalculation in the formula of the potion I was brewing. Yes, I, Severus Snape, made a mistake." he sneered at her expression of disbelief. "A mistake I had hoped never to make again. You see, Miss Granger, I had come across some notes to a potion I had started when I was attending school. I thought that perhaps now, with greater experience, I might be able to avoid the problem. Obviously, I did not. The potion, when swallowed, caused a rather unwelcome side effect, which I haven't been able to rid myself of."

And he lowered the hood.

Hermione pressed a palm to her mouth, trying to stop the laughter that rose in her throat, but it burst out in a sort of choked cough.

"Ah...Professor, that's quite an _interesting_ problem you have there." she managed to get out, all the while staring unabashedly at the wizard. This, she thought, was certainly the sort of thing she had been expecting, just not...from him.

Instead of the dark strands of hair that normally framed the Potions Master's pale face, his black eyes glittered dangerously under long, lank strands that were loudly and undeniably..._pink._ His entire head seemed to radiate rose coloured light, so neon was the effect of the potion.

"Um, I think I have something over here..." Hermione quickly made her way to the vast cupboard containing hundreds of potion vials, humming quietly as she ran her fingers over the many neatly written labels. "Ah!" She plucked one containing a pale blue substance from its shelf, holding it up before the light and turning it. "Yeah," she said, carrying it back to the murderous-looking Professor. When he cocked an eyebrow at her, she shrugged.

"We live in castle with a few hundred teenaged girls. You think I haven't seen a few botched Hair Colouring charms?" Something that sounded remarkably like a chuckle escaped the man, and he uncorked the small bottle. He inhaled deeply, closing his eyes and savoring the scent, before opening them and nodding once. Without a word, he raised the vial to her, and put it to his lips,draining the potion in one.

For a moment, nothing happened. Then, slowly, the unnatural shade began to recede into the roots of his hair, leaving it as black and limp as it had ever been. Hermione quickly seized a hand mirror from her desk, offering it to Snape. He took it in long, slender fingers, turning his head this way and that, till he was satisfied that the concoction had done its job. He made a sound that seemed to be a relieved sigh.

"Thank you, Miss Granger. Those several hundred teenaged girls in the castle are certainly lucky to have someone who knows her vanity potions so well." Hermione blushed.

"Well...it's not just memorized inventory. I'm guilty of trying to do something with this-" she pointed dejectedly at her slightly more tamed but still wild head of curls "-in my fifth year; I thought perhaps uncontrolled chaos would look better in black. But I was stupid enough to let Lavender Brown cast the spell." Snape winced.

"It seems that even great minds make mistakes- present company included." Hermione blinked in surprise. Had the stoic "dungeon bat" just paid her a backhanded compliment?

"I should probably make my way to the Great Hall. I'm sure our beloved Headmaster will come and hunt me down if I don't. Thank you again, Miss Granger." Hermione wrinkled her nose at the address.

"Oh, please. I was Miss Granger for all my years of school; call me Hermione." The Potions Master raised an eyebrow.

"Then...I suppose you should call me Severus."

"Severus." Hermione tested the name in her mouth; it was a strange feeling, but not at all unwelcome. "Well, Severus, if you don't mind waiting a moment, I might close up the wing and join the feast. As you can see, it's a slow night, and if something happens I can always get here fairly quickly." He made a sweeping gesture with his hand. "Of course." Quickly, Hermione darted back into the office, organizing the papers with a flick of her wand.

"All right. I'm ready." Severus offered her his arm, and she fit her small hand into the crook of his elbow.

"Then, let us go." As they exited, Hermione swept her wand in an arc, and the lights extinguished one by one.

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**So? Short, I know, but the voices couldn't be ignored! You know you want to press that little purple button...**


End file.
